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collective :: Beloved Aoi
contact :: email : icq : aim
wishlist :: Amazon : FlaxArt


Archives

Catt's books

Boneshaker
Dreadnought
Four and Twenty Blackbirds
Bloodshot
Clementine
Wings to the Kingdom
Not Flesh Nor Feathers
Hellbent
Fathom
Those Who Went Remain There Still
Dreadful Skin
The Living Dead 2
The Thackery T. Lambshead Cabinet of Curiosities: Exhibits, Oddities, Images, and Stories from Top Authors and Artists
Bewere the Night
Ganymede
The Inexplicables
Dead Witch Walking
The Good, the Bad, and the Undead
Every Which Way But Dead
A Fistful of Charms


Catt's favorite books ยป
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OH MY GOD, WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE, SERIOUSLY.

I just. I. I mean, I have a dim view of people in general, and my brain still just refuses to accept this. And she’s only getting a year? And even with a year of jail time looming, she is not remotely apologetic, but rather spiteful and–I can’t even call it childish, because most children would behave better.

What fucking brain trust gave that bitch a plea deal? A girl who would do that to a kitten, will do just as bad or worse to a human being. AND I HOPE SHE STARTS WITH THE CUNTRAG WHO GAVE HER THE DEAL.

Get the fuck off my planet, the whole fucking lot of you.

From the latest VH1 email…

Ideally? Die in a fire.

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So. Finally watched the Clone Wars movie. I wasn’t expecting it to be good, really, cause…well, I’d seen the ads, frankly, and I remembered reading a review saying it was largely aimed at the kiddies. And yet, I was still expecting it to be better than it was. I just…ignoring the SW-specific problems with it, it just wasn’t very good. And the art style that was unique and kind of cool in the more traditional animation lost its charm and a fair amount of its flow in that faux-3D computer stuff. Add in the SW problems on top of it, it…just kind of got smushed under its own suck.

For one thing, and this is petty and nitpicky, but its also the smallest sin it has — getting Sam Fucking Jackson and the awesome-itude that is Christopher Lee back, really just emphasized the way everyone else was just pale imitations. And in the case of the Obi-Wan VA, a really bad imitation. He said every line in the exact same cadence like he was stuck in his own personal hell-sonnet, or something. (If he and the not-Willow from “Chaos Bleeds” ever got together, the world would weep.)

Other problems it had, that like, an hour on StarWars.com’s official databank or even Wookieepedia would’ve fixed:

– Hutts are neither a clan nor a family. They’re a species. A giant, grotesque, sluggy species. You shouldn’t even need SW.com for this one, a functioning brain and the fact that there’s Chewbacca the Wookiee but not Han the Solo should’ve made it pretty obvious. Also, because I refuse to give them two separate notations — a Hutt speaking Basic? Please. Assuming they’re even capable (which…I can’t remember, and I am not getting paid so I don’t have to look it up, neener), that shit is beneath them. ….in their own minds, anyway.

– 13 is not too young to become a Padawan. It is, in fact, the cut-off point. If you don’t have a Master by then, THEY SHIP YOU OFF to become a farmer or a pilot or if the Force really hates you, a miner. Just ask Obi-Wan. The Force almost hated him a LOT.

– THAT IS NOT HOW A PADAWAN IS CHOSEN.

– That girl spent her whole childhood in what is basically a religious order and is still unable to show respect to her elders? And specifically the one who is now in charge of her training and thus her entire future as a Jedi? Yeah, no. She’d have been shipped off years ago if she couldn’t even learn that much.

– A 13-yr old girl has sufficient power and control over the Force to bring down a stone wall? In one piece? AAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA.

– Asajj Ventress grew up on a war planet. She went from street urchin to champion to warlord to being recruited by the Sith. She held her own against Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi, but a scrawny kid half her size did not get killed immediately and even managed to deflect a couple blows? I…I can’t. You. My suspension of disbelief has a hole in it, now.

– NO, REALLY, THAT IS NOT HOW A PADAWAN IS CHOSEN.

I’d be irked by such blatant ignoring of the rules of the universe it takes place in, anyway, but I think its worse because George and his people are usually a lot better at keeping shit in line. He might do some light retconning himself, but other people are usually on a tighter leash, and that has been A Good Thing.

Of course, there is an upside to all this. There’s finally something Star Wars that I absolutely refuse to buy.

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GODDAMMIT, SIDESHOW.

I HAVE A LIST, OKAY, AND IT IS LONG ENOUGH WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS SHIT ON ME. IT DOESN’T EVEN FUCKING LOOK LIKE ROBERT ENGLUND, BUT IT’S FREDDY AND IT’S AWESOME AND FUCK AND ALSO YOU.

Dammit. You’re going at the end of the goddamn list. After the ones I’m still on the fence about, even. After the wallet-raping Tonners, including the blue Glinda. You are going so far down the list that we will live in space ships and no longer use money before I get you. YOU ARE GOING AFTER THE ATHENA I KEEP TELLING MYSELF I’M NOT GETTING.

You- I– You are so awesome.

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*shifty eyes* If anyone asks, I am in no way reading Selena Gomez/Demi Lovato fic. Absolutely not. That is totally not the kind of thing I would do. I’m astonished you would even think such a thing. What kind of person do you take me for? THESE ARE NOT THE DROIDS YOU’RE LOOKING FOR.

I mean, um. *waves hand mystically, flees*

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BAH. Why is it that now that I actually have some money, no one wants to list the Angel I want? CORDY NEEDS HER SALTY GOODNESS, PEOPLE, WORK WITH ME HERE.

Actually, there is one, but…its in the UK, and boxless. If it was one or the other, I’d probably go for it, but for overseas shipping, I really would prefer that extra layer of protection the original packaging would offer. I’m not writing it off completely, though, just because it is so hard to find the one I want at non-obscene prices.

In other news, I have been taking a B-vitamin complex, and my skin is getting better already. My cheeks aren’t so dry and flaky-but-not-actually-flaking anymore. YAY!

In other other news, Birds Eye microwave steam-fresh corn singles are greatly inferior to Green Giant ones. They’re still pretty good, though. I wish someone would make lima bean singles. Or if someone does make them, I wish that stores in my area would carry them. (Yes, I like lima beans. I always have. Yes, I am weird, thank you for noticing.)

And finally, a message to SciFi — you cannot make me refer to you by that vile “creative” spelling bullshit you changed to, and it is very close to being the last straw in a slow descent into complete suckitude. Keep jamming it in my face nonstop, and the only time I’ll watch Eureka (and, when it comes out, Caprica) is via Netflix. And I won’t be the only one.