Finally saw Olive Juice. I’ve been tormenting myself with the idea of seeing it for awhile, but wanted to hold off because it seemed like the kind of film Amelia would appreciate (read: very gay, and oh, the badness). So, this weekend while I was visiting, we rented it.

Its, um. Wow. Leighanne needs to not make a movie ever again. I know Brian adores her and all, and one hopes that its reciprocated fully, but neither she nor her film would have gotten anywhere without his name, his band, and his money, and I’m pretty sure she knew this, and I think perhaps that was a consideration in her decision both to wed and to spawn with the man.

I mean, seriously? Brian and AJ’s presence in the film is advertised loudly on the box, she is listed as Leighanne Littrell — and I’m sorry, but if she wanted to make it on her own terms, she’d still be working under Leighanne Wallace, thank you — she and the male lead are the only actors listed in the opening credits, and, oh yes, Leighanne is the executive producer. (“Honey, will you help me fund my movie? I’ll give you a blowjob!” “SURE!!!”)

Brian and AJ are easily the best actors in the film, and considering that they appear for a total of maybe fifteen minutes, and AJ doesn’t even speak, that should tell you something.

Still. Its better than Crossroads, if only because its not deluding itself that its a Real Film, with Acting and Plot and Talent, and Its Good!! No, Olive Juice makes a small attempt to not be a complete waste, but also seems rather content to have its existence justified by nothing more than the presence of two boybanders. Call me kooky, but yes, I do have to respect that.